Friday, 6 July 2007
Jason Lee pisses all over my childhood memories...
...well he has already broken my heart with his alien worshipping fake yokel ways, the cunt. In Mallrats he was pretty much the coolest thing to ever ramble around on two legs, and now? Not content with desecrating my memories of him, he has to make one of my favorite childhood cartoons into an excretable Christmas movie, designed purely to kick visiting relatives and small children out the house for two hours between Boxing Day and New Years so Mum can have a fag and a large Avocaat.
CGI? *shudder* WTF? Do they think kids today are too cynical to watch chipmunks with silly voices unless they look like members of NWA? Christ, Alvin looks like he's packing a piece - he wants to stab you in the leg and steal your mobile while Theodore films the whole thing on his phone.
I used to love the Chipmunks, especially the Christmas episode they played every year that I seem to remember involving a harmonica..and the spinoff with the girl chipmunks. Classic!
Jesus why don't I just kneel down now so Jason Lee can stick it in my ear and totally fuck the rest of my memories?