The Cross-Chart of Awful Facebook Fanpages

Gawker wrote this great article yesterday called ' The Eight Types of People to Unfollow on Twitter or Defriend on Facebook'. Whilst I totally agree with them about Twitter, I'm dead against de-friending people on Facebook. Completely block their access, sure. Hide all their fucking 'Today God Wants You to Know' and 'Bejewelled' updates, but deleting only limits your own source of information and endless amusement.

I love that I can basically work out the torrid life story of one psychopath I used to know about four years ago through her 'TMI is putting it lightly' status updates and 'cryptic' photo comments. I live to find out what utterly ridiculous fanpage another friend has joined each day. In fact, it was this latter 'friend' who inspired me to make this cross-chart of psycho fan pages. All real, all grammatical errors intact and all including at least one of my friends amongst their membership. Oh, and most have over 20,000 members. It's like that realisation that even when you're brazic and eating toast for dinner, you're still wealthier than 97% of the people on this planet. Only with brains.



Click on chart to read it more clearly.

THX 1138 to Hemen for this one...

This is the front cover for the DVD of George Lucas's debut film THX 1138, a science fiction about a underground dystopian world where drugged up drones lead lives devoid of emotion or feeling.

My friend Hemen works in HMV, a partially underground dystopian CD and DVD shop, where he helps drugged up drones find discs to stick on the goggleboxes so they have something to stare at whilst they eat their Chinese takeaway later.

THX 1138 is currently on sale for £2.99.

*Man wanders up to Hemen, holding aforementioned bargain of a DVD purchase*
"Oh right, what's this about then?"
*He flips the dvd over to skim the back, which aside from the blurb also displays a large film still of a drone getting violently beaten up by a group of police androids*
"Jade Goody?"
"Errrrm. No, not really. Not at all actually."
"Oh."
*Visibly disappointed, the man wanders off*

Person of the Day - My Friend Bee

The News Feed on Facebook is a nice-if-inane way to drip away your time - oh look! Dave Roberts is tired! There is a whole album of group photos of Lorraine Smith and some other people I don't know looking pissed and pulling the same two faces! Blah and Blah are attending PUT A CANDLE IN UR WIDOW 4 BABY P ad nausum.

Well anyway, occasionally you get a little semi private gem from someone's life that makes you snort in laughter and then have to pretend you sneezed instead because you're meant to be fannying around with that spreadsheet:


That this girl is a potential paramore, only makes it all the better!