Yes, yes I know it's been a while (although not as long as I feared it had been) since I have written on this thing... I've been busy at work and so have probably lost all my loyal following (hello you two!) but oh well, I'll keep wittering into the void and pretend that there are people all over the world hanging on my every word.
I think last time I started blogging again it was inspired by some impotent rage I was taking out on the poor tv, and this time is not much different... recently several adverts have Got My Goat, so I have returned victorious to smash them down to size.
Case 1: BASF Group.
A man climbs up a glacier. He falls! But wait! His rope saves him. An invisible rope. This rope is BASF who rather self importantly call themselves THE chemical company, and thanks to their 'invisible contribution' there is a visible result.
Biche says: Wait, why are they THE chemical company? Aren't Glaxo Smith Cline a chemical company? Call me naive, but in this capitalist opportunistic climate, I somehow doubt that there is only one chemical company. This means they must really mean 'da' like 'you da man' and frankly that's just embarrassing. The more pressing issue however is the very point of the advert - invisible contribution? Then why the hell are you shouting about it three times an hour? That's like me repeatedly announcing that I direct debit monthly money to Amnesty International while in the pub and expecting praise and adulation every single time and not the 'shut up smugface, what are you trying to prove? Get a round in' that I would receive.
Case 2 - Frontline
Oh noes! The dog has the flees! Worrawegonnado?? Why, get Frontline flea repellent of course, 'The Gesture of Love you can Trust'
Biche says: This advert was obviously written by someone so jaded by 'dinner at a place with forks = putting out' that she now lives alone with hundreds of flea free cats.
Oh okay I had more, but now I've been distracted by Bear Grylls twatting around a Saharan salt plain with a urine soaked t shirt on his head, so I will leave you all for now safe in the knowledge that soon I will be back with some...funny...stuff....yeah?